Archive for October, 2011



Jessica Simpson Announces She’s Pregnant


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Jessica Simpson finally owned up to the single worst-kept secret in Hollywood since John Travolta’s hairpiece, tweeting this morning:

It’s True! I am going to be a mummy!

She’s gonna be a mummy. So the baby bump has been explained. What has NOT been explained, however, is why the announcement was accompanied by photos of Dee Snider dressed the Michelin Man if the Michelin Man were homosexual and trapped in Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” phase. I’m afraid that one will forever remain a mystery.


Jessica Simpson Announces She’s Pregnant


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Jessica Simpson finally owned up to the single worst-kept secret in Hollywood since John Travolta’s hairpiece, tweeting this morning:

It’s True! I am going to be a mummy!

She’s gonna be a mummy. So the baby bump has been explained. What has NOT been explained, however, is why the announcement was accompanied by photos of Dee Snider dressed the Michelin Man if the Michelin Man were homosexual and trapped in Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” phase. I’m afraid that one will forever remain a mystery.


Jessica Simpson Announces She’s Pregnant


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Jessica Simpson finally owned up to the single worst-kept secret in Hollywood since John Travolta’s hairpiece, tweeting this morning:

It’s True! I am going to be a mummy!

She’s gonna be a mummy. So the baby bump has been explained. What has NOT been explained, however, is why the announcement was accompanied by photos of Dee Snider dressed the Michelin Man if the Michelin Man were homosexual and trapped in Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” phase. I’m afraid that one will forever remain a mystery.


Jessica Simpson Announces She’s Pregnant


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Jessica Simpson finally owned up to the single worst-kept secret in Hollywood since John Travolta’s hairpiece, tweeting this morning:

It’s True! I am going to be a mummy!

She’s gonna be a mummy. So the baby bump has been explained. What has NOT been explained, however, is why the announcement was accompanied by photos of Dee Snider dressed the Michelin Man if the Michelin Man were homosexual and trapped in Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” phase. I’m afraid that one will forever remain a mystery.


Jessica Simpson Announces She’s Pregnant


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Jessica Simpson finally owned up to the single worst-kept secret in Hollywood since John Travolta’s hairpiece, tweeting this morning:

It’s True! I am going to be a mummy!

She’s gonna be a mummy. So the baby bump has been explained. What has NOT been explained, however, is why the announcement was accompanied by photos of Dee Snider dressed the Michelin Man if the Michelin Man were homosexual and trapped in Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” phase. I’m afraid that one will forever remain a mystery.


Kim Kardashian is Filing for Divorce


h1 Monday, October 31st, 2011

Boy, pass out with a bottle of Crown for a few hours, wake up in time for a Simpsons rerun and you miss Kim Kardashian’s entire fucking marriage. It seems Our Lady of the Tinkle filed for divorce from husband of 72-days Kris Humphries this morning, citing “irreconcilable differences.” TMZ says:

Even though the marriage was short, [Kim] is not seeking an annulment. It’s a garden variety divorce, in which Kim cites “irreconcilable differences.”

The date of separation is listed as today, Oct. 31, 2011. According to the docs, Kim wants Kris to foot his own lawyers’ fees and she’ll pay hers. And, she wants the court to reject any move by Kris to get spousal support.

The docs list the length of the marriage as a measly 2 months.

So she stuck it out just long enough for E! to air her stupid wedding special a couple of times. A whole 72 days. It was a complete fucking sham from the get-go, predicated on making more money and higher ratings for everyone involved. This stupid bitch can’t even take a shit without conferring with E! as to which brand of toilet paper gets to purchase the rights to her asshole. Now we just wait and see which of several online legal resources gets to sponsor her divorce.