Celebrity Bathwater

See your favorite superstars of years past sell their images out to sell you beer, liquor and cigarettes.

Who is the shill?
gloria dehaven

What are they hawking?
smoking

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because vice is the new virtue!

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ encourages you to put your favorite celebrities in a place where you can ogle them constantly without fear of anyone seeing (except for maybe the person who uses the computer to the left of you at work)

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Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Being an enabler to your staring problem

See your favorite superstars of years past sell their images out to sell you beer, liquor and cigarettes.

Who is the shill?
Glenn ford chesterfield

What are they hawking?

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because vice is the new virtue!

• Rosie O’Donnell tries Cocaine (after we did, yo) on The View and ends up launching snot rockets all over the stage.
• Jared Leto soldiers on with his campaign of retardation by dressing like a gay ninja and continuing to allow words to spill from his mouth.
• Little Superstar continues freakishly dancing his way up our spinal cord, through our our cortex and into our hearts.
• Dustin Diamond (aka “Screech“) may or may not have recorded a freakish sex tape from which we may or may not learn some pretty sweet bonin’ moves.
• Is there any hope for Hollywood Hipster Love? Not if Zach Braff has anything to do with it!
• The Coreys are making their triumphant return to primetime television (well, A&E at least) and we’re Blown Away by our excitement.
• In one moment of stage-frightened red carpet urination, Steve-O managed to shatter our very last shred of hope for the future of humanity. Then he farted and punched himself in the face.

Our guest this week, Mindy Raf, is a NYC comedienne who has made a name for herself as a regular contributor to CollegeHumor, a popular touring stand-up, the proprietor of a funny blog, and a featured actress on the celebrated Post Show online sketch comedy program. She’s also rather chesty. Anyway, we had her shuffle her iPod and share with us the first five resulting tracks. Judge her, ridicule her, then do your own shuffle and leave the results in the comments!

1. “I want to love you in my room”, Irving
2. “Boxing”, Ben Fold’s Five
3. “Barrier Reef”, Old 97’s
4. “Baby”, Rufus Wainwright
5. “O what a beautiful dream”, Elf Power

Esquire Magazine really steps out on a limb in their upcoming October issue, naming Scarlett Johanssen the “Sexiest Woman Alive.” The undeniably beautiful Scarlett tends to draw a lot of attention in Hollywood because she is the only one brave enough to eat 2 meals a day (it’s a wonder, given L.A.’s values, they don’t refer to her as plus-sized.) In the issue, she is portrayed as an “enigmatic trailer-park temptress,” sporting a “cleavage-baring black lingerie paired with an open white robe, among other get-ups.” (”Get-ups”? Like this?) Well, guessing from the screenshot grabbed from Google News above, her cleavage is all you really need to see to figure out that it’s her… so it seems Esquire hit this buxom nail right on its curvaceous head.

Ever wonder what Christmas is like at Pete Doherty’s house? Well wonder no longer!