Celebrity Bathwater

Mariah Carey weighs less than the tongue of the blue whale.*

…

*please note that this just may be true

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because fiction is a lot more interesting than facts!

We can’t promise that she’ll look cracked out in every picture, but this is Courtney love we’re talking about. You’re bound to get lucky 9 out of 10 times.

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because Courtney Love is annoying!

Jack White Embarrasses Man, Calls Him “Playa”

At the end of boll weevil, some drunk guy jumped the stage and startled Jack from behind. He grabbed the mike, screamed “Jack’s looking for a home!!” and then ran and took a flying leap into the pit straight towards us! (at the greek, there is a 6 foot high wall, with the “front row” a good 3 feet back from the edge. The guy must have jumped at least 5 feet out and 6 or 7 down into the packed front end of the pit.

In other news how long has Jack White been looking this creepy?

The best part of the page has to be this comment.

Need a visual of what Jack White can do to you? Google Image search “jason stollsteimer” and look at the first picture that comes up. That guy is lucky he got off the stage so fast.

We at Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ went ahead and did the research, and it’s not pretty.

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because Jack White will mess you up!

Yesterday! As reported on Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢, we brought you the story of Fred Durst’s hacked sidekick. Literally hundreds of seconds of research at The Smoking Gun has blown this story WIDE OPEN and exposed the tangled web of mystery we all knew had to simmering in the background.

One week after a sex video starring Fred Durst began circulating on the Internet, the Limp Bizkit front man has filed a $80 million lawsuit against web sites that posted the footage and stills from the singer’s X-rated romp with a former girlfriend. In a federal copyright infringement/invasion of privacy complaint filed Wednesday in U.S. District Court in Los Angeles, Durst notes that he recorded the racy video around 2003 (with the consent of his partner) and that it was “never intended to be shown to the public.”

In a declaration filed with the lawsuit, Peter Katsis, Durst’s personal manager, states that he was contacted last December by the “owner of a pornographic video company” who claimed to have access, via a third party, to a video showing Durst having sex. Katsis said he rejected the individual’s offer to sell the video and share the profits. Katsis said that he eventually spoke directly with the third party, who is not identified, and again rejected proposals to commercially exploit the video. In his declaration, Katsis noted that he was aware of the existence of a Durst sex video, but believed that it was stored safely on the hard drive of the performer’s personal computer. However, on February 25, Katsis said that the third party told him that Durst’s computer had been hacked and that stills from the video had been posted online (the third party, Katsis reported, told him that “the same individuals who hacked into Paris Hilton’s cell phone” had stolen the video from Durst’s computer).

In a declaration filed in support of a motion for a temporary restraining order against the web sites, Durst lawyer Edwin McPherson stated that Secret Service agents were investigating the Hilton and Durst hacks as “connected” events.

Ahh, there’s nothing like The Smoking Gun

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Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Cutting celebrities down to make your sad life seem more bearable.

Utterly Untrue Celebrity Trivia of the Day: August 30

Lindsay Lohan is surprisingly fast on land. Although she’s rapid, she’s not agile; so if you ever find yourself chased by her, run in a zigzag line. You’ll lose her every time.

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because fiction is a lot more interesting than facts!

We can’t promise that she’ll look cracked out in every picture, but this is Courtney love we’re talking about. You’re bound to get lucky 9 out of 10 times.

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Because Courtney Love is annoying!

Jessica Simpson kisses homeless man

Jessica Simpson kissing what looks like a homeless man. Even more disconcerting is the guy with the ridiculous grin in the background with his head half cropped out.

What’s going on in this picture?!

Celebrity Bathwaterâ„¢ — Fact checking only slows down the news!